High-Achievers Into Harmonious Leaders
Hi Reader,
You're Not Having a Crisis. You're Having a Reckoning.
I read Jessica Grose's piece in The New York Times this week, "American Women Are Leaving the Work Force. Why?"—and had to pause. Not because the numbers surprised me. I'm living them every week in my coaching sessions.
212,000 women left the workforce between January and August 2025. Meanwhile, 44,000 men entered.
But here's what those statistics don't capture: the lived experience of senior women who've spent decades building careers, only to find themselves at a crossroads they never anticipated.
What I'm Actually Seeing
For eight years, I've been coaching directors and above. The patterns right now are both heartbreaking and paradoxically full of possibility. Senior women aren't leaving because they're tired. They're leaving because they're being systematically sidelined:
Either they're passed over for promotions they've earned, or they watch less experienced colleagues leapfrog past them.
Or they're handed poison chalices, cleanup roles in failing divisions, turnarounds with no resources, the "fix this toxic cultures" assignments designed to be unwinnable.
One client told me, "I was given a territory three men destroyed, half the budget, and six months to turn it around. When I asked for support, I was told I needed to prove myself first."
She didn't fail. But she didn't stay either.
Black women are experiencing this most acutely. Their unemployment rate hit 6.7% in August 2025 - up from 6.3% in July and 5.8% in June - while the national average was just 4.3%. Between February and July, approximately 300,000 Black women lost jobs or left the workforce. Contributing factors include overrepresentation in the federal workplace (where massive cuts occurred), DEI program rollbacks, and concentration in vulnerable sectors. Learn more from the National Partnership for Women & Families.
Add return-to-office mandates that eliminate the infrastructure many women built their lives around, and you have a perfect storm.
The Psychological Toll
There's something Grose touched on that I need to name explicitly: the chilling effect.
When programs supporting working women get defunded, when "highest male standard" becomes policy, when diversity initiatives are labeled "divisive," it sends a message:
Maybe you're not here because you're excellent. Perhaps you were just a diversity checkbox.
I'm watching brilliant women who've spent 20+ years proving themselves start to question if their achievements were ever truly theirs.
The exhaustion of constantly defending your right to exist in spaces you've earned? Eventually, excellent women decide they're done fighting.
But Here's What Gives Me Hope
Women are redefining success. And it's not a retreat - it's a reclamation.
They're not giving up. They're getting clear.
They're asking: What do I actually want?
What does success look like when I stop performing to other people's expectations and start listening to my own inner wisdom?
You're not having a crisis. You're having a reckoning.
And on the other side of that reckoning? Clarity, alignment, and a version of success that actually belongs to you.
This Is Why The Reclamation Exists
Throughout my career and in my coaching practice, I've been committed to harmonious leadership that doesn't require you to abandon yourself to succeed. I'm on a mission to support women to thrive, whether that's in corporate or out. Because here's the truth: it's not one-size-fits-all
Some women will stay and redefine leadership from the inside. Others will leave and build something entirely their own. Both paths require the same thing: clarity about who you are and what you actually want.
I created this six-month journey for women standing at this exact crossroads, women who've checked every box and are now asking: There must be more than this.
The Reclamation helps you:
- Remember who you are beneath the performance
- Reimagine what becomes possible now
- Reclaim your path forward, aligned with your values and deepest wisdom
I'll share more information about the program in the coming weeks. But let me close by saying this:
The Reclamation was born out of a great love and respect for the women I support, and a desire to help our current leaders curate a life beyond survival mode to thriving.
And if I'm being completely honest? I want to play a small part in creating a world where my 24-year-old daughter doesn't have to recover from her career as a professional woman. I want her to know, deeply know, that she has choice and agency to curate a life on her own terms.
That's the world I'm building, one woman at a time.
The Reclamation begins in February 2026. Limited to 8 women.
Your life is calling you back to yourself. Will you answer?
Schedule a complimentary 30-minute Clarity Call | Learn more
A Note to Male Leaders
The women in your organization are navigating all of this right now.
When a talented woman seems disengaged, turns down an "opportunity," or leaves, this is the context. She's not being difficult. She's being strategic about her survival.
You can help by noticing who gets cleanup roles versus growth opportunities, advocating for flexibility as infrastructure (not indulgence), and listening without minimizing.
Women aren't failing. They're choosing themselves.
And in a system that was never designed for their success, that might be the most powerful act of leadership there is.
With clarity,
References: Grose, Jessica. "American Women Are Leaving the Work Force. Why?" The New York Times, Oct 1, 2025.
"Economy in Freefall: Black Women Carrying the Weight." National Partnership for Women & Families, September 2025.
PS: If today’s message spoke to you, chances are it will speak to someone you know, too. Forward it along to a friend or colleague; you never know who needs the reminder that success and happiness don’t have to be at odds.
|
|
Coach's Corner:
Before we go further, I want to ask you something:
What would you tell your daughter or your younger self...to do if she were in your exact situation right now?
Sit with that for a moment. Because the answer you'd give her? That's your inner wisdom speaking.
|